God's enduring love shines through life's tests

By Judith Auslander
FROM HEART TO HEART for The Register-Guard
May 15, 2004

In a world that often seems thoughtless of others, we rush here and there and think about our own problems. I once reached for an artificial form of relaxation - a glass of wine, a beer, or maybe even a joint - when the stress was too much.

For some it's not a substance; it's sex. It is even romanticized in movies.

This is how I led my life until I found the Bahá’í Faith. I was a student and volunteered for a crisis line, but my spiritual life consisted of getting high.

This pattern continued until someone told me about Bahá’u’lláh, the prophet-founder of my faith.

I first heard this prayer by Abdu'l-Baha, the son of Bahá’u’lláh, and it touched something inside me:

"O God! Refresh and gladden my spirit. Purify my heart. Illumine my powers. I lay all my affairs in thy hand. Thou art my guide and my refuge. I will no longer be sorrowful and grieved; I will be a happy and joyful being. O God! I will no longer be full of anxiety, nor will I let trouble harass me. I will not dwell on the unpleasant things of life.

"O God! Thou art more friend to me than I am to myself. I dedicate myself to thee, O Lord."

This was a powerful experience. No longer was I alone. I could give my troubles to a higher source. I realized I could be happy rather than miserable.

I am not saying this is easy. It takes constant prayer and reflection. The most interesting aspect is to realize that tests are a natural part of life and are, in reality, a gift from God.

Again, Abdu'l-Baha says: "Men who suffer not, attain no perfection. The plant most pruned by the gardeners is that one which, when the summer comes, will have the most beautiful blossoms and the most abundant fruit."

I have only begun to understand that tests are part of growing to become a better person - that tests are actually part of my reason for being here.

With each test that God gives me - or I give myself - I become a better, stronger, wiser person, submitting to him for my salvation. I feel more resilient, less vulnerable to the winds of chance and fear. God has a purpose for me.

As Bahá’u’lláh says: "O son of spirit! I created thee rich, why dost thou bring thyself down to poverty? Noble I made thee, wherewith dost thou abase thyself? Out of the essence of knowledge I gave thee being, why seekest thou enlightenment from anyone beside me?"

It is then clear; sex, alcohol and drugs play no part in who I am as a spiritual being.

They are, at most, only a transitory salvation to humanity's ills.

Rather, the answer is to go to my higher source. There I can find all my strength and my answers.

Judith Auslander attends Sunday devotional services at the Eugene Bahá’í Center, 1458 Alder St. This column is coordinated by Two Rivers Interfaith Ministries, a network of faith communities in the Eugene-Springfield area. For more information, call 344-5693.